Can You Rent Cats Part 3

So Friday morning I am leaving for work and a see a sign in the front yard that says, "You mess with my family I will mess with yours."

I think nothing of it and I head to work. Later in the day I am in a lunch meeting and my phone is blowing up. It's wifey. What's so urgent I wonder. I step out of the meeting and check my messages. She is unnervingly calm, "I just want you to know that I saw another mouse."

I call her back and she is very upset. One of them, Ronnie, Bobby, Ricky or Mike briefly held them hostage. That is why she was so calm in the message, any false move could have been death. She wasn't sure which one is was 'cause he had a mask on. But I knew, who else could it be. At that moment I know what that sign meant........The war is not over.

That's all I got!

I'm out!.
44 Black

Can You Rent Cats Part 2

There has been changes in my war against the mice. My disclaimer first, we ain't nasty(see part 1)!!!!! Here is the updated score sports fans.

Papa Joe - 1
Mice - 0

Here is the scoop. As of Thursday morning the mouse (I was hoping there was one at that time, more on that later) the mice were still laughing at me and my primitive traps but that was all about to change.

On Thursday afternoon I come down stairs into the living room and I see a mouse running at 100 miles an hour from my desk to the couch. I have to admit, it froze me. OK it scared me a little. Then I thought of my little daughter who has adopted Ralph as her pet mouse.

"If I let this go on she will turn out like Michael Jackson. Hanging out with Emanuelle Lewis, and going to school with silk pajamas and a Captain Kangaroo sport coat on."

This thought transformed me into Papa Joe. It gave me the strength to move forward. I had to take action. I decided to arm myself. I ran and got the broom. I to do it for little Michael. I took a deep breathe and slowly bent over to move the couch with one hand while I held the broom in the other. I had flashes of a vicious battle ahead of me but I bravely moved forward. I moved the couch.......Nothing. I moved the other end of the couch.....Nothing. I searched and searched.....Nothing. I had been outsmarted again. I could almost hear him laughing! "Papa Joe my ass!" he was saying.

I put my broom away and took a deep breath. "Whew, you know you was scared anyway." Good thing no one else saw you. They would have laughed.

After putting the broom away, I walked back towards the living room when my wife came downstairs. We were walking towards each other about 15 feet apart and she was starting to ask me a question when it happened.

"Baby, do you know where the..........." She went silent. She stopped midway between steps, one foot still in the air. She stopped breathing. I could tell because when she screamed, nothing came out.

There he was walking on the floor between us. Only this time much slower. Like he was trying to disrespect me. "I'm gon' scare you in front of yo' woman. Wit' yo punk ass!" he seemed to be saying.

I'm not gonna 'bitch up' in front of my woman. I started after him while my wife slowly (ok quickly) backpeddled out of the room and back upstairs. I chase him under little Michaels brand new potty. I say brand new so you don't think, "they got mice cause the baby is shittin' in the living room." So, brand new out of the box OK? It has a light down in the potty? I don't get that. Doesn't that encourage the baby to put her hand in the potty? Whatever, back to the story at hand.

He's under the potty plotting his next move. I am over the potty plotting mine. I know if I go for the broom he will be gone. I know that is what he is betting on. Being the ACE hunter I am, I improvise. I choose to continue to give chase. I will exhaust him. So I kick the potty, again clean empty brand new, and Ralph takes off like the wind. He is headed for the stereo speaker in the corner. He gets behind it before I can cut him off.

"It's over" I thought. I will just turn the speaker flush to the wall and crush him. Obviously, Ralph had seen this strategy before because as soon as I turned the speaker he took off again. This time through the dining room, I am giving chase furiously turning over chairs and tables in the process. No fear now, there is only adrenaline when you are in the heat of battle.

He turned left when he hit the hallway and I was right behind him. When he turned the corner he found that all three doors there were closed with no room to get underneath. He bumped his head as he tried to get under the final door. When he saw this would not work he decided to turn and face me.

There we were face to face. Two warriors in a battle for supremacy of this household. Mano e Mano. He snarled and flashed his fangs at me but I didn't budge.

"Be careful sweetheart, I love you!!!!" my wife said, "Is your life insurance paid up?"

"Don't hurt him Papa Joe" the baby cried out.

We stared into each others eyes. One waiting for the other to make a move. He went first, he charged me snarling. I armed myself by kicking my foot backwards. I had my Nike flip-flops on. This backwards kick flipped the shoe over my shoulder. I caught the shoe in my left hand and swatted downwards as Ralph lunged at my throat. He was down. It looked to be a broken hip or smashed pelvis because he was still trying to run but he was running in a circle on his side. Kinda, like curly from the 3 stooges used to do.

He knew it was over but he still had some fight in him. " He looked up at me and said, "What are you waiting on? Finish it!!!! You scared? Yea that's it you are scared.....Punk ass? I'm gonna get up outta here, get fixed up and I will be back to punk you again" Ralph said, "Wait till my boys get here, Ronnie, Bobby, Ricky and Mike" he called in a faint voice.

"Cool it now" I said, as I put the size 13 Nike flip flop on him with force.

I stood and savored the victory. I dropped the flip flop to the floor and raised my fists, "YES, I'm Papa Joe bitch!!!!!"

That's all I got!

I'm Out!
44Black

College Football Power Rankings

I know, I know, I am way behind on this. I will try to do better. I was celebrating the Notre Dame loss two weeks ago to Michigan and the near loss the week after to Michigan State. I was so happy I did not have to put them in my top 10 that I did not post it at all. Well, better late than never.

1. USC - Now that Texas has lost, they are the man until proven otherwise. They will beat down Washington State today.

2. Ohio State - They will have their hands full with Iowa today but they are too explosive on offense. They win going away.

3. Auburn - They already did their thing this week. They will take care of Arkansas next week.

4. Florida - Impressive win at TN. Big game coming up against LSU.

5. Michigan - At MN today. No Sweat.

6. Texas - They have a patsy this week and OU next week.

7. West VA - They really should not be here because they haven't played anybody.

8. Georgia - Ole Miss - No worries

9. LSU - Miss State. The LSU defense will swallow them whole.

10. Oregon - You stole one against the sooners. How much did that cost Phil Knight? I didn't know he had connections to the Pac-10 officials.

Predictions
VA Tech over GA Tech
OSU over Iowa
Oregon State (the real OSU) over CAL. That is today's upset special. Like any of you care about the Beavers. I hate the Ducks so I have to mention the Beavs.

That's all I got!

I'm Out!,
44Black

Can you rent cats???????

The cute but not sexy post is coming but right now I have a more pressing problem. We have at least 1 mouse in our house! No, we ain't nasty. There is some sort of mouse problem around here. The problem is they are in my damn house!

My wife is holding it together but only temporally. She is going to have a breakdown if my mouse hunt does not show results soon! The oldest daughter (the drama queen) swears she saw one jump from on top of the fridge into a boiling pot of noodles, grab a noodle and jump out again. I'm gonna have her pee in a cup.

The baby is playing with them like Michael Jackson, "Hey Mr. Mouse we won the talent show!" I'm trying to play Joe Jackson and kill the S.O.B.'s but they ain't having it. I got traps everywhere and I have not caught one damn mouse. WTF!!!!!! These are Chicago mice so maybe they are smarter than the average west coast mouse I have dealt with in the past. I got the 'snap your neck' traps with peanut butter, I got the sticky traps and I got the bait all over the house.......Nothing. These bastards are laughing at me!

I'm getting desperate because my wife said that is she sees one she is going to a motel with the kids. Wait a minute, that means peace and quite...........I'm kidding........I think. I'm wondering if I could rent a cat for a few days. My sister owns a cat but it's on the east coast and the cat is a pussy. House cat that has been sitting around on his ass all his life, getting his meals handed to him. He's never had to get out and hustle up a meal. Maybe I'll go to the humane society and pick up one for free. Those cats are street/gutter/gulley right? They been out there hustling so if I put one in my house and don't feed him he is going to take care of my problem. What he won't know is that as soon as my problem is gone so is he. Right back to the pound.

That's all I got!

I'm Out!,
44Black

Is it me or does Kelis look like a scarecrow reject from the Wiz?

Beautiful skin, but there is something that is very unsexy to me. I can't figure out what it is and it bothers me every time I see a shot of her. Maybe she is trying too hard. Sexy is not about trying to be sexy it is being sexy anyway. Sexy is something you can't really screw up. Either you got it or you don't. I think I am going to do a cute but not sexy post. That will be fun.....Look for that soon.

I guess I will have to do a not sexy, not cute post also. I will have one male on that list. If, of course, you ladies don't mind me speaking for you. I may not know what a good looking man looks like but I know one that's jacked up..........FLAVA FLAV!

Then I will also put up a not cute but sexy post. That one can be difficult and as controversial as the cute but not sexy one. However, the not cute but sexy post may have some people looking crazy at you......I don't care 'cause you don't know me. So I will tell mostly the truth.

That's all I got.

I'm Out!,

44Black

It's in My Future

This is the dream ride. The Bentley Continental GT Coupe. It's in my future.....Promise! Speaking of the future how does one change his or her future???? I know God has it laid out for you but there has to be alternate paths right???? There has to be because so many people end up in bad spots in here lives. Maybe God gives you forks in the road that you choose which one is the right one. After all, you do choose the path that leads to him or leads to a much worse place.

All this leads me back to the question. How does one change his or her future? I know the standard answers. I know the Tony Robbins' self-help, self improvement answers. Robbins even believes that one decision can change your life forever, so he even believes that you chose your path. How do you get off the path you are on and go to another. But not only that how do you stay on the new path? How do you develop the faith and internal fortitude to stay on that path when it is terribly uncomfortable? It may be good for you and your life but it is terribly uncomfortable. The old path is bad for your life but it is uncomfortable. How do you re-train yourself?

The majority of our community, the Black Community, have not re-trained ourselves. We have not re-trained ourselves since slavery. What good is freedom if your mind is not free. We were dumped on a new path but we had no map so we were uncomfortable. So what have we done? We have retained the freedom title but we went back to the slavery mindset/path. That mindset has keeps us contributing in a slave like fashion to a system that a large part of our community gets no wealth out of. The difference between now and then is that now we contribute our labor and our wages. During slavery we had no wages.

The point of this post is not to talk about that larger issue but to talk about me. How do I change my path/mindset. I have lived a life that appears to be a cake walk to some, but a nightmare to me.

I lived in what appeared to be a decent household growing up. I was the star high school athlete, good grades, football scholarship, M.B.A., Fortune 500 companies and a beautiful wife and family. Yet all the while, I struggled to make it thorough every day because at home I was an abused child. Every positive signal I got outside my house was negated by the negative ones I got at home. I was abused for years and no one knew. So here I am at 40 years old with so many successes in my life and I can't in my heart, accredit them to me. Just dumb luck I guess.
People look at me and see something good, something positive. Me, I just hope they don't find out who I really am. A sad, insecure little boy who has no idea what to do with his life.

Now, that I am dealing with my past I have to retrain myself. How do I tell myself, and believe, that I (and God of course) have created and driven these things in my life? The thing that makes me most sad is that I see my potential (as I do in many other people) going to waste. If the good things in my life are by my doing then I (and God) have created them while using 4 out of 12 cylinders in my engine. The other eight have been dedicated to just getting myself out of bed and through the day without losing it for so long that it will be difficult to re-deploy them into truly living.

The real me lives in a box most of the time. Only with certain people that I trust do I let all of me out. The box is how I protected my self when I was young and I continue to do so. Here is a piece I wrote about 'The Box'.

Life in the Box

------------------

Dark
Safe
Self-contained
Insulated
Painless
Loveless
Joyless
Fearless
Shameless
Safe

That's all I got.

I'm Out!'
44Black

College Football Power Rankings Sept. 11

We've got a huge weekend of college football coming up. There are seven, yes seven, Top 25 teams going head to head on Saturday. Predictions for those games are coming up but first let's get to this week's 44Black College Football Power Rankings

1 USC This week - Nebraska
2 OSU This week - Cincy
3 Auburn This week - #4 LSU
4 LSU This week - # 3 Auburn
5 ND This week - Michigan
6 Texas This week- Rice
7 Florida This week- #10Tennessee
8 West Virg. This week- Maryland
9 FSU This week - Clemson
10 Tenn. This week - #7Florida

Predictions for this week? Here they are:

• LSU@ Auburn this is a toss up that Auburn will win at home
• Miami @ Louisville - Look for Miami to look like Miami this week vs. a UL team that no longer has a running game
• Michigan @ ND - I want to pick against ND so bad I can taste it but Michigan is not what they once were. ND by 2 TD's
• OU at UO - I was impressed with the Ducks on the road at Fresno State. A very tough place to play, I've played there. Autzen stadium is a toughter place to play. I did my thing there too. The Sooners will keep it close but the Ducks will win
• Nebraska @ USC - I like the Trojans - BIG. Nebraska is getting better but they are not ready to be a national power again. Much less play against one!
• Florida @ Tennessee - Very tough call here. UT destroyed a solid Cal team last week plus they are at home. I'm taking the Vols

That's all I got for this week. I will be coming with Pro Power polls in the near future.

I'm Out!,
44Black

Poetry: Journey Back to the Light

Journey Back to the Light

In the beginning the day was bright and warm. By the end of the fifth year the cold, dark storm clouds came. By the eighth year the storm began and was unrelenting like the winds of a hurricane. I forgot the light of the sun. How it felt, how it looked. My heart turned cold. I sought shelter in a cave. The longer the storm lasted the deeper I would retreat into the cave. Eight years later the storm ended but the damage remained. I feared to see the damage so I stayed in the cave for 14 more years. Upon my emergence from the cave I was shocked to see the intensity of the light, startled to feel the warmth of the light. The light is full of life, emotion and happiness. It’s nice to be back!

Cheaters II

Oh, I can't forget about Marion Jones and her ex-husband. Both steroid cheaters. Come to think of it, her baby's daddy Tim Montgomery was a steroid cheat also! The world sucks!

Cheaters

Why is the world full of cheaters? I was going to say that sports world but sport is only a microcosm (spelling) of society. Hey, even our President cheated to get his office. The previous President, who I love by the way, cheated on his wife.
In American society there is an extreme pressure to be successful. It has apparently come to the point that failure to be the best is not an option. You must do anything to be the best and we eat it up when you are the best. We are also more than happy to tear you down when you get there.

For instance, I loved Barry Bonds at the height of his dominance, but now I am sorely disappointed in him for his obvious steroid use. We didn't say anything a few years ago when pitcher would walk in a run rather than face him. We didn't say anything even though he looks like a completely different person than he did just 10 or 12 years ago. They say his jealousy of Sammy Sosa and Mark McGuire (2 other cheaters) drove him to steroids. He had to be the best.

While I am on baseball how about Rafael Palmero? He lied about cheating on national television in our nation's capital under oath!?!?!?! Is there anything that is pure anymore? Jason Giambi got a pass because he made an admission and he started to produce after that. That confession by the way was amazing. How do you admit to using steroids without actually using the word 'steroid'. Barry Bonds is an asshole and a defiant black man. Media people and apparently law enforcement in this country can't handle that so they are crucifying Bonds. They are doing all they can to bring perjury, tax evasion and a number of other charges against him. Who leaked Bond's Grand Jury testimony? Another cheater! Bonds is just one of many in baseball that have and continue to cheat. Baseball is riddled with cheaters.

How about justin Gatlin? This guy is a piece of crap too! I am tired of all of these guys trying to come off as the All-American when they are not. This guy had it all but now he has nothing because he cheated. He had the 'fastest man in the world' title and he was at the top of his sport but what does it mean if you cheated to get there? All it means is that you have a lot of money but you have to live life paranoid that you j will be found out at any moment. Is that what all this is about?????? Money? Maybe it is because everyone is cheating with these performance enhancing drugs. Even guys who can't be great but they could be good and get paid with a boost are taking performance enhancing drugs.

What about the Tour de France? What a mess. Cycling is full of drug users also. Floyd Landis, made so many excuses, some of them were just embarrassing. He sucks too!

Why is it that no one takes responsibility for anything anymore? If you screw something up, you say 'I screwed up, my bad, I'm sorry.' These days you deny, deny, deny and then tell some good lies. Most athletes are control freaks at some level. They have people who do things for them and lay out their diets and workouts so you can't tell me you didn't know you were ingesting this drug or that you did not know what the cream was that was being rubbed on your body. I am not an idiot, therefore, I am sorely disappointed in sport and our society.

All this comes from an ex-athlete who has been tempted by performance enhancing drugs. I have seen them close up and seem what the can do. Believe me it is not all good.

The pressure to be the best and make money I our world is so great it causes people to give up their moral fiber and it is disgusting.

I'm Out!,
44Black