Saturday, October 26, 2013

"It's Our Anniversary"

"Today is a special day, not just any day
Cuz you can have everything you want your way
Tell your supervisor you're leaving early today
And I am going to pay for the rest of your day"

That's the group Tony, Toni, Tone's song "It's Our Anniversary."

Well our 11th Anniversary was yesterday.  We went out to dinner at our favorite sushi spot.  The food was awesome as usual but the night was an absolute disaster!

Where do I start.  Let's go back to the beginning of the week when I was told that my gift would not be good enough and that only one gift would do.  The current wife's competition with my ex-wife (from the previous century) continues in terms of gifts received.  I don't think I have blogged about the competition before so I will drop you some knowledge there.

My current wife, #2 of 2 (does that make my life sound like a disaster?) wants to make sure that she gets better versions of the same gifts that wife #1 got.  Did I mention wife #1 and I were married in the previous century?

Therefore, any diamonds received in the 20th century by the first wife must be paid errrrrrrr, gifted to the second wife with interest in today's 21st century value with greater color and clarity.  For example, a 2 carat ring in the previous century would have to be a 4 carat ring with better color and clarity ratings in today's 'giving' terms.  Bear in mind this is only an example "Dramatization" I only deal in CZ in real life!

So at the beginning of the week my wife announced what her gift would be.  Of course that gift made my unannounced offering look like it came out of a cracker jack box.  Luckily, at that point I had not announced my gift so at least I was the only one who could see my tail between my legs.  I will give her credit in that she said later in the week that she did not want the gift because she thought it was too expensive.  We all know that the amount you are supposed to spend is 4 times the number anniversary.  11 years times 4 equals $44.

Then at mid week the wife discovers she has a sinus infection so she is sick and on meds so she is not supposed to drink.  I like to get her drunk.  I can get to the goodies quicker!  She had two at dinner anyway but I am getting ahead of myself.

The day of the anniversary (I took the day off) we can't go to the movies during the day because our son was leaving for a wrestling tourney in Vegas and we have to take him to the airport.

Also on the day of the anniversary our 8 year old daughter was also sick so she could not spend the night at a friend's house.  Not a big deal but that meant we could not get a room in the city for the evening.  Meaning I would have to get the goodies in my regular old bed instead of shelling out $250 for a room in the city to get the goodies.  $250 SAVED AND FREE GOODIES!  That's looking at the cup half full!

The powers that be, you know the (wo)man prevents me from going into too much detail here but the conversation at the dinner table was a disaster.  Likely my fault but I wanted to have pleasant if not sexy conversation.  Instead we kept talk and disagreeing on unpleasant subjects so I changed the subject.....twice.

The second time I changed the subject I did say "Can we talk about something else?"  I think she misunderstood and thought I said "Can we talk about something else like silence?"  Granted my statement could have been perceived as rude but it is very likely I said it in a very pleasant Chicago style tone.

That was the end of the conversation for the evening.  Dinner ended with us staring out the second story window of the sushi joint watching the night life in Chicago's Ukrainian Village come alive.

Needless to say there were no goodies when I got home.  Only and 8 year old with snot hanging out her nose who has had a miraculous recovery since we left for dinner.  So let's see, wifey is less than happy with me, $200 spent on dinner, $250 saved on a room and NO GOODIES!  My social math tells me I spent somewhere between $50-$200 not to get the GOODIES and to sleep in a bed of snot, flu and sinus infection germs!

Love is a wonderful thing.  Part of real love is that a crappy day, week, month or year is not the end of love.  It's just the temporary end of the goodies.

That's All I Got!
I'm Out!
44Black

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